Ladies and gentlemen, time for Rand’s exposed demise

One, two, three, four, five, time to make it funky cause ta’veren has arrived
At the Tairen Stone around the corner
The girls say they want some TLC but I really don’t wanna
Give in like I did last week.
I’m just a guy, didn’t ask for the sky
I liked chocolate, broccoli, mutton on pita
Now three females are rivals with a wannabe Lolita
So what can I do? I’ve got three girls on a string;
Scrap my power for some summer fling?
Anything goes, it’s strange I don’t got syphilis
"Comforting" to thrill us.

A little bit of chaos in my life,
A little bit of Berelain by my side
A little bit of jealousy makes me bleed:
(A little bit of Elayne’s all it needs.)
A little bit of Min to lighten the stress
A little bit of Aviendha in distress
A little bit more to help catch herpes,
A little bit daily makes me you diseased!
Rand’s exposed demise.

I’ve been around, I’ve been around the town,
Shake your head at the sound, put your beaten hands down.
Take one Advil and one Tylenol
My impropriety is kinda off the wall
My blood on the rocks, and then the Heron twice
Forecast looks lugubrious, so I savor every night.

A little bit of Egwene once was fun,
A little bit of Min makes the windmill run.
A little bit of Elayne when I’m free,
A little bit of Berelain’s all I see.
A little bit of Aiel in the falling snow,
A little bit of ANYBODY, here I go.
A little bit of everybody gives me AIDS
A little bit of me in all o’ these maids!

Herpes, syphilis
Rand’s exposed demise, ha, ha, ha.

A little bit of lovin’ in my life,
A little bit of choice regardin' a wife.
A little bit of Maidens of the Spear
A little bit of Min nibblin’ on my ear.
A little bit of Elayne in the Stone,
A little bit of Egwene long, long ago
A little bit of promiscuity
A little bit of that makes me unhealthy!

I know there ain’t to cure for a plague like this
And I know that one day I’ll fly,
To The Happy Hunting Grounds in the sky.
Rand’s exposed demise.