RJ Chat Transcript from Barfs and Noballs
Admin: Hello Mr Jordan, thanks for gracing us with your presence - it's an honour to have you here!
RJ: Yeah, yeah. *yawn*
Admin: Okay, lets have the first question.
HarrietJordan: Hey Bobby love, did you want that rabbit-pie for dinner?
RJ: Sure hon! Bye.
Admin: Next question.
Quentin from Wotism.org: Hey Mr Jordan, I think you are nothing short of a demi-god, so handsome, so clever, oh how I love you, you sexy man you.
RJ: Erm... thanks. Was there a point?
Quentin from Wotism.org: Yes, I was wondering what would happen in the final chapter of the last book.
RJ: And you thought I'd tell you? Admin, what the hell are you doing letting this jerk through?
Admin: Sorry RJ, I thought you'd like it. Next question.
Shadar Canine: Hi RJ. Now, you know that Aiel that fell off the skimming platform....
RJ: Oh no, not you... if you ask me if we are gonna see him again.....
Shadar Canine: Well, will we?
RJ: NEXT!
Ramo: Woo hoo, RJ! Warders are crap aren't they!
RJ: Well I wouldn't go that far....
Ramo: Always getting dominated and browbeaten and downtrodden by those fascist Aes Sedai types...
RJ: Well.... not always I mean....
Ramo: But you wouldn't be one would you RJ?
RJ: *lol* Not on your life, but...
Ramo: HE SAID IT!!!! HE SAID IT!!!! MY LIFE'S WORK IS COMPLETE!!!! MwuHAHAHA!
RJ: Er.... okay Ramo, you have fun now. Sheesh.
Admin: Next question!
IQof10 from wotism.org: Hello Mr Jordan Sir, I love you, and you have an exceptional beard. I too, have a beard, though I am female. My question is to do with
Asmodean, I was wondering...
RJ: This isn't who killed Asmodean is it?
IQof10: No....
RJ: Are you sure?
IQof10: Yes.... Er.... when Asmodean died, who was the last person he saw?
RJ: RAFO!
IQof10: Read and Find out?
RJ: No, in your case, Read and F*** off,
Admin: Next!
Egwene2: *giggle* Hullo RJ!
RJ: Well hello.....
Egwene2: Have you seen my new kitchen cabinets?
RJ: Me?
Egwene2: Yes! Oh they are so lovely, yhey are the loveliest shade of....
RJ: NEXT!
Shadar Canine: RJ, hello! Now, if Mat Cauthon was a Pizza topping, what flavour would he be?
RJ: *frowns* Are you on medication, hound? I'm not answering that.
Shadar Canine: Okay, well you know that Aiel who fell off the skimming platform....
RJ: ARRRRGGHH!
Admin: Next Question, please!
Rhodric: Hi Mr Jordan. Some people think that dark is the direct opposite of light, don't they, where as others argue that darkness is merely an absence of light, and
by parallel, we can also argue that the Dark One is not so much the emodiment of evil, more and absence of goodness and order, so that....
RJ: What is your point, Rhoddy?
Rhodric: Do ya agree that coke is better than pepsi, RJ?
RJ: Hell yes, pepsi sucks.
Rhodric: YES!
Eg2: They are really nice, and the doors have very ornate handles on them and...
Admin: Next!
dweeb from wotism.org: Mr Jordan! Oh how pleased I am to meet you, oh God of literature, oh master of fine beards, oh..
RJ: *sigh* Rafo.
Admin: Anyone left?
Shadar Canine: That Aiel who fell from....
Admin: Not you! Anyone else?
Rogosh: Your book sucks!
RJ: What?
Rogosh: Wait... no, it doesn't! I like it. Sorry. Carry on.
RJ: Erm... thanks.
Draelin: Am I too late?
RJ: No, just in time!
Draelin: Only I was running down some stairs to get here, and I tripped in these damn shoes, and fell two stories, but fortunately I landed on my flat mate, who is an
even flatter mate now, and then I got my finger caught in the door, and my head stuck in the oven, and....
RJ: Oh dear... you poor thing. Are you hurt?
Draelin: No, just got a few cuts. Hope I'm not a haemophiliac.
RJ: Bleed and find out.
Admin: That's it! That's enough. That pun was just too far. Say goodnight RJ.
RJ: Goodnight!
Admin: All over folks! Go home now.
*pause*
Shadar Canine: Is anyone still here?
Admin: Go home, Hound.
Shadar Canine: But the Aiel on the platform.....
Admin: Go home!
Egwene2: Hound? *slaps Hound* Now, you want to hear about my kitchen, don't you! Well...
Shadar Canine: Okay, I'm going home!
Admin: Wait for me....
And that was how it happened, honest.
~Shadar Canine